All day colic anyone?

[Kristin]

My son has colic that is all day. Fortunately he sleeps as night most of the time 3 hour stretches mostly. We have found a few things that soothe him most of the time: going on walks, driving, swinging in the swing (sometimes). We spend all day doing these things so I don't lose my mind.  Anyone else doing this where it is all day long? He will be 9 weeks tomorrow. I am dreading going to his 2 month appointment on Friday because I know the pediatrician will ask about what he can do and to be honest I don't know because we spend all day most days trying to soothe him. I don't know if he can track things with his eyes, lift his head, etc.  I am trying to stay positive as much as I can, but does it really ever end? He's formula fed. Nutramigen. We've tried gripe water, gas drops, the 5 s'. He was just recently put on Zantac for possibility of silent reflux but I'm not sure if it's had any effect. We are going to my sister's wedding at the end of June when he will be 13 weeks and I am praying by then it will be over because how can we be at a wedding with a crying baby where most people in my extended family will meet him for the first time. I am dreading the judgement.  I don't even like him most days. I feel no bond whatsoever. Does it ever end?

[Kristin]

I feel like I may have made the biggest mistake in my life by having a child. And who says that?

[Louise]

My son sounds exactly the same. Nightmare. Some days 8am till 11pm. Not sure how much more I can stand. Fortunately I already have a 3 year old daughter who was a very easy baby so I have something to look forward to, just wish I knew when it would stop.

[Kristin]

That sounds like us. From the moment we get up until he goes to bed and sometimes he does it during the night too. I'm sorry you're going through this too but I'm glad I'm not alone. My husband is in graduate school far away from our family, so I knew having a child and being away from family would be a challenge, but not like this. We had to have some friends take our dog for a while because we can hardly get anything done for ourselves let alone caring for anyone or anything else. I feel like we have to live outside our home for the most part which at least soothes him most of the time but then I can't cook anything, can't take care of anything around the house, take a shower. This is our first baby and it makes me feel like right now it will be our last.

[Kristin]

How do you even know when it is over? We are so far into this at this point I feel like I can't see my hand in front of my face.

[ALM]

kristin,
its SO hard. I have a baby boy that is now 15 months old. he is SUCH a joy right now. im sorry your going through this. unfortunately, I know how you feel. I had a very VERY traumatic birth experience with him too, he came out blue and in the nicu for weeks and I was already exhausted when I brought him home, but he had severe colic. BAD colic. the kind your describing but he was up every hour all night long. he JUST started to sleep through the night and hes 15 months old. We were SOOOOO tired and like you described we were prisoners in our own homes, we could barely eat....listening to blood curtling screaming all day long PLUS not sleeping, is pure hell, plain and simple. your not alone in feeling isolated or that your not enjoying motherhood is wrong. IT IS NORMAL. but it DOES get a lot lot lot better as they get older. not gonna lie, having a toddler is still exhausting, hes running now and throwing tantrums and still some nights doesn't sleep, but its not the never ending utter exhaustion cant make it through the day as it used to be. It does slowly, SLOWLY get better but I hate to say it does take a LONG time, at least for us it took a solid 13 months before things drastically improved. Im here for you if you need to talk more. all I can say it hang in there, being a first time parent is the hardest adjustment EVER, and to be completely honest with you, im still in the one and done camp, we still cant comprehend how people do it again. but at least now I can honestly say I enjoy being his mother.

[Kristin]

We have had some very big improvements over the last couple days. I hope they last.

[SC]

We have an 11 week old baby girl who has had colic since she was born. We had to sleep in the living room because we realized she would at least sleep for an hour with the television on as opposed to 20 minutes at a time. Now I can say she at least sleeps for 3 hours at a time but last night was horrible. She was up most of the day yesterday and went to sleep at 10:30 last night. Woke up at 1:30 and wouldn't stop crying until 5 am (the norm for 5 weeks now). She is sleeping now and I would sleep if I didn't have to take care of my 9 year old while my husband is at work(who only got 3 hours of sleep). We are walking zombies and I am desperately trying to tell myself that I don't regret having her. She was planned and we were looking forward to being parents again. My 9 year old son was such a sweet baby and a wonderful boy who is now sad because his parents are stressed and tired and have very little time to play with him. I feel so horrible for not feeling happy. I cry a lot as well. For many reasons: Out of exhaustion. Out of self pity. Out of desperation. Out of regret for feeling the way I do. I always hear that she should start growing out of it in a month or two... what happens if it takes longer? How do I hang on until then? My little girl has her days and nights mixed up so we started to try and shift her schedule so she will sleep at night, which would help me be a better mommy as well, but it makes her cry more! Or adds to the myriad of reasons that she cries. I feel so horrible for not being happy being her mom. We have tried gas drops, gripe water, baths, swaddling, walking in the house (it is over a hundred degrees outside everyday so going out is not an option) and putting her in a swing. I am completely exhausted right now and feel like such a horrible mother. I see other moms with more than 2 kids and they make it look so easy.

[Kristin]

SC,

Have you tried white noise since she sleeps better with the tv on? Where do you live that it is that hot consistently already? You are doing great. It will get better

[Kristin]

So frustrated. I guess I should have known better. We were having a good day, minimal crying other than for needs and my son was awake and happy for a while so I thought "hey let's try some tummy time." What a horrible idea. For 30 seconds of tummy time, literally we got almost 25 minutes of unsoothable crying. What is it with these babies seriously. They get so set off by who knows what. So frustrating! I should have known better than to push my luck.

[Audrey]

My daughter, who is now 13 weeks has been colicky since birth. We have literally tried everything to help her- gas drops, gripe water, probiotics, reflux meds, even chiropractic care. Not a single thing helps and it's exhausting. She sleeps ok at night for a few hours at a time but will only sleep in her swing and refuses to nap at all during the day. She needs constant motion either from a swing, bouncing on a yoga ball or in the stroller. Everytime I try to put her in the car she screams when we hit the first stop sign. I feel like I'm trapped here at home until she gets better and I'm starting to feel hopeless.

[Melissa]

It gets BETTER - I just wanted to say that... I was on these boards all the time while our little girl had colic and I loved seeing success stories of how it ended and things got happier. I promised myself that when we got through the black hole then I would post our story to give hope to other moms. I felt all the things you did - such a deep sadness and guilt for feeling like motherhood was a misery instead of a joy. At 8 weeks our little girl (who had screamed 7 hours straight every night since birth and often through much of the day) finally stopped. I know it was earlier than most - we had expected to at least go to the 3 month mark that everyone talks about and it took me weeks to even believe it was over! We had tried everything (gripe water, reflux meds, ect.) and had just switched to Enfamil Gentlease 2 days before it stopped. I breastfed almost exclusively, but my husband would give her a bottle for bed and when she woke during the night when it was my turn to sleep. I don't know if it was the new formula or her tummy just matured, but literally one day it was over and she started sleeping at night like a normal baby. Now at 13 weeks she sleeps through the night and although she is still super active and LOUD when fussy, I know can always calm her down. There's always a reason - wet diaper, hunger, boredom... instead of the screaming and screaming for no reason that we endured before. She's super smiley and her face lights up when she sees us - we've been able to fully bond and love being her parents. We can go outside, spend the day at the park, have lunches an dinners with friends. Things are SO MUCH better... Although I would say that that thought of having a second child still terrifies me :/

ALSO - the biggest thing that I did to get through this was to take care of myself. Our daughter was having a hard adjustment to the world and the best thing I could do for her was be as healthy and calm as possible to guide her through it. Colic can destroy your sanity and your relationships with the people who could help you the most. I got PPD and had asked my husband to keep an eye on me prior to giving birth in case I did get depressed. He saw the effect colic was having and told me it was time to go to the Doctor. I did and started taking anti-anxiety medication and anti-depressants. It made a huge difference in my life - I was able to cope with the situation, and although things were still very hard, it didn't feel hopeless and I wasn't sobbing with the baby every day. My husband stepped up and took more of the nighttime duties so I could stay as rested as possible, and since my family lives in another state, we also got a baby nurse to come in every day for a few hours to give me some relief. I know that isn't an affordable option for everyone but the peace it gave me was incredible - whatever help you can find to give you some time away from the crying, make it happen! Family, friends, hired care. The baby won't mind if you're gone for a little while, but it will suffer with a depressed mom. And trust those who want to help when they say that the crying doesn't affect them the way it does you - you're the mom, so you feel it in such a stronger way. Take every moment you have to nap, go out for some quiet time, shop... whatever will give you some normalcy through it all.

And remember, it will be better and you will have a happy, healthy, and much quieter baby