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Post by Amy on Jan 3, 2008 10:09:26 GMT -5
I've got a ray of hope today finding this site! I have an 18m old and now a 5week old newborn. Unlike the classic "time" my newborn screams from 4am on! It is now 10a and he hasn't stopped! Like all of you, I cry for him, then feel anger ( really at not being able to stop it) , am exhausted....feel like I've tried everything like teas, gripe waters, formulas ( also feed him pumped breast milk)- I don't see how you all got thru it!! I feel like putting him down and shutting the door since nothing helps anyways, but then I feel too guilty and terrible. Meanwhile, I've got an energetic toddler to deal with. Give me hope!!!
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Post by mommyof2gurlies on Jan 3, 2008 10:30:02 GMT -5
I've been there!!! We had a 3 year old running around at the time.... It was so difficult to deal with her...for a few months things were so chaotic..she was so stressed out, my relationship was falling apart. I felt really guilty that I had been selfish in wanting another baby...and now because of it my life was falling apart. I remember everyday waking up thinking "What did I do??? My life was perfect before this, why did I have to go and mess it up"  Yah, the majority of those teas, herbs, gripe waters...don't work. Just a waste of money. Time is the only real thing that helps, and I know thats the LAST one you want to rely on!! Its hard enough to get thru the day, let alone a few more weeks. My baby was like yours...she didnt have a certain hour she cried. She literally cried ALL day. If she wasn't sleeping or eating, she was screaming. I even had to get on anti depressants because it was just a little more than I could handle, with no family in the area, and a husband that works graveyard shifts. Have you tried swaddling yet? The only thing that helped us when she was a little older (8-12 weeks) was swaddling (i used TWO kiddopatamus wraps....TIGHT) and would swaddle her in her swing, with the white noise machine going next to her. We still have a fan that goes next to her crib at night as white noise, just because it blocks out all other noises. I remember taking her to the ped. and being in tears looking at him and asking "what can i do??? give me something for her...i cant get thru this, I'm not going to make it....I can't handle this" My ped. told me she was the worst case he'd ever dealt with in his 20+ years. (Woo! Way to make me feel better doc!! YEEESSH) Try to get as much help as you can, breaks as you can.....Keep in mind its not forever. It will get worse before it gets better, but once you're over that hump things will look up. Its hard, I won't lie...but you'll make it thru it. You don't really have a choice  If i had had another way out, i probably would have done it ....i was really desperate. If someone had told me I could have put her in foster care or something until she was done with her colic...and I hadn't felt so bad about it, i would have done it. I just didnt have another option or another person to help me out, so I pretty much HAD to deal with it. Keep coming on here...there is an incredible group of ladies that have all been thru the hell you're going thru....or are going thru it currently. It really helps to have someone understand 100% where you are coming from. Its hard to find that with colic. Lots of people try to judge you, not knowing what its like.... Hang in there... |
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Post by Amy on Jan 3, 2008 10:35:55 GMT -5
THANKS! It's my "turn" again to go hold him, so off I go. But I'm glad there's people willing to really tell it how it is. It's not just a little hard- it's awful. I have all those same feelings you had. Time....you're right...is what it takes!  |
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Post by mtmomx3 on Jan 3, 2008 10:44:40 GMT -5
I agree with Tamara, she is such a smart lady. It does subside and I know that you are going to get sick of hearing time makes it better because in a month when the baby still screaming you are going to call us all liars. However, you will wake up one day and he will be all smiles and you will then realize its over the worst part. My baby is 6.5 months and she has been over colic since around 4 months or so. She is still a high needs child but she doesn't scream at random anymore. Swaddling, a vibrating chair, and a specific paci were the things that helped Olivia. Colic Calm helped a little but it is horribly messy and very expensive for wht you get. I nurse her but during the worst of it she stayed latched on almost all day because it kept her happy and calm. Not real realistic I know, my other children are 9 and 7 so my options of sending them off to play are a lot better. The most important thing to remember is hes not going to stop so if you need a few minutes set him down and walk away. Your other child needs attention also. You also need you time, as hard as it seems to get a shower and get the house done you need to try and find time to just ignore the minor details like dusting or whatever once in a while and do for you.
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Post by mommyof2gurlies on Jan 3, 2008 11:07:18 GMT -5
Yah, i have to suggest...no matter how stressful things get, try to take atleast 10 mins a day of just one on one time with your toddler. For us, it was bedtime....Everynight I'd read 3 books and cuddle with Mya at bedtime....even if Brooklyn was screaming in her crib, i made sure Mya got her "mommy" time too. It made a difference....
Our house was a disaster zone. I ALWAYS do Mya's hair really cute...and right after Brooklyn was born people started telling me "Wow, mama....Mya's hair is looking a little bit rough these days...." I looked rough too. I *DID* take breaks though. Especially when I was home by myself with both girls...I'd take Brooklyn into the bathroom with me, while I took a shower, and let her sit and scream in her carseat. Atleast I knew she was safe, I WAS GETTING A SHOWER!!...and about half the time the white noise of the shower would put her to sleep.
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Post by aliki on Jan 3, 2008 14:20:44 GMT -5
I am so where you are, just a few weeks ahead..I posted all about my situation on the "Hello from colic hell" post. This message board is so great though, and I am glad you found your way to it.
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Post by pamcrt on Jan 3, 2008 17:27:50 GMT -5
Amy, First of all, know that you are not alone. Know that you have found the most wonderful site with the most AWESOME group of ladies. I have been on here since Abby was about 2 months old (on the 20th she will she 9 months) and I have gotten so much wonderful support. Abby's colic lasted until she was 5 months. Horrible, I know. And I swear if another doctor says the magic 3 month mark I will take my size 8 shoe and shove it so far up their butt it comes out their mouth... gross I know, but that leads to false hope when it doesn't happen... and it didn't happen with us. Like Tamara we used all sorts of gripe waters, teas, etc., but the only things that worked were the swaddles (we used 2 also wrapped very tightly), propped up sleeping for 5 1/2 months, no white noise- Abby is the only colicky baby I think that did NOT like white noise. We went to a hypoallergenic formula- expensive but worth it, levsin for stomach cramps, mylicon for gas and peppermint bottles when her tummy was upset. It seems like a lot but we did what we had to just to get through the day. And that's just it, you go through one day at a time because if you try to do more than that you will get overwhelmed. And definitely try to get help and take time for yourself. You will need it to get through these next couple of weeks. I have 4 other girls to take care of and let me tell you, they were horribly neglected by me because I just couldn't deal with the stress, so I too got put on medication to deal with it, including the severe PPD I was going through. So hang in there, keep posting, we will help out wherever and lend an ear when needed. Pam |
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Post by deeter54 on Jan 5, 2008 8:25:08 GMT -5
Welcome to the site Amy. You will find lots of support here. I have really learned alot from coming to this. The ladies are so informative.
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If i had had another way out, i probably would have done it ....i was really desperate. If someone had told me I could have put her in foster care or something until she was done with her colic...and I hadn't felt so bad about it, i would have done it. I just didnt have another option or another person to help me out, so I pretty much HAD to deal with it.